“Don’t take anything personally. Nothing others do or say is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions of others you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.”

                                                     ~ Don Miguel Ruiz

Ok, so it would be impossible to go through life without ever taking anything personally or blaming someone for something, but we can eventually get to the point that blaming others for our life’s circumstances and seeing ourselves as victims is not our “go to” perspective.

As our ego begins to form in our younger years we begin to see how the need for control and power (or the opposite, the desire for no control and power which translates to victimhood) in our interpersonal relationships plays out.

There are several reasons why some ego structures adopt the mask of “victim”, a couple of them being: lack of confidence in oneself, afraid to lose control (which causes them to hold on to their illusion of control so tightly that anything that goes array is always blamed on someone else) or even fear of our own power (which causes us to want to place it in the hands of another so that we never have to make big decisions or changes in our lives).

It doesn’t really matter what the reason is, but whenever we fall into this mindset, what we are really doing is setting ourselves up for failure, disappointment, and eventually misery. When we have completely disempowered ourselves and handed our power over to someone else we most certainly will come to a point where we will encounter frustration and anger.


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